Saturday, May 28, 2011

THE PERFECT SUCCESSOR

Ryder Silas
(Photo courtesy of Bryson and Lele)


Here's the dilemma:  

The E*Trade baby is getting too big for his diapers.  

I think I can help the ad agency out.

What do YOU think? 

If you agree, please write the E*Trade people and attach this blog post--my resume--for their consideration.

Mahalo!  Until next time, this is Ryder Silas--

Peace.  Out.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Saturday, May 21, 2011

DYLAN'S LOW RESISTANCE ABDOMINAL WORKOUT

Dylan's Award-Winning Ab Workout
With a Spot from DAD!
(Photo courtesy of Erin and Pua)


Hi, my good-looking friends!

Today, I want to demonstrate my world-famous DYLAN'S ABDOMINAL WORKOUT.

Having a strong, healthy core is vital to good health and longevity.  Especially in Hawaii, where we love to eat, exercise that firms up the abdominal region is so important!

So, follow these steps, and I GUARANTEE you are going to see results in 90 days!

1)  Find a well-cushioned area to lie down on...in this case, I found the perfect spot--my dad's tummy.

2)  Cross one leg over the opposite leg.  

3)  Put your hands behind your head.

4)  For extra challenge and exertion, add some resistance.  Here, I've placed my faithful companion--Octavius the Octopus--on my right upper thigh.

5)  GRIN a lot!  Grinning burns even more calories, especially important after eating my mom's good cooking.

6)  Make sure your spotter has secured your extended leg.  You don't want to pull any muscles.

7)  Final step?  Just lie there until you and your spotter fall asleep!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

TWO EGGS IN A BASKET

Cousins Ryder and Kalaunuiohua
Relaxing at their Wailua Homesteads Estate
(Photo courtesy of Erin and Pua)


Wow, Kalau!  This is awesome!  We found the green Treasure Egg!  Kalau...uh, KALAU?

Wha'?  Oh, sorry, cuz!  I was just trippin'.  You know, it doesn't get better than this!

Huh?

Serendipity, Ryder, serendipity.

Kalau, you younger than me, but ever since Braddah Dylan gave you that Kindle, you've been reading tons of books and spitting out these watermelon-size words!  What does SEREN-DIPPITY DOO DAH mean?

Serendipity...it's being mindful of the moment when one accidentally discovers something wonderful or meaningful...kinda like finding an invisible Treasure Egg!

What you trying to tell me?  You just laid an egg?

Sorta...but it's an IDEA EGG.

Okay, I give...Lay it on me, brah!  LAY IT ON ME...ha-ha, cuz, I made a funny!  Is that seren...seren...ah, you know what I mean!

Yeah, I guess so.  But here's MY serendipity.  We may never have this moment again in our lives, Ryder.

What moment is that, Kalau?

When we as men can feel secure in our identity.

Huh?  Whatcha mean by that?

Someday, when we're much older, we will look at a photograph taken of us this very day and deny the moment by joking and acting shame.

Huh?

That I was a cute blue-eared bunny dressed in camou, a cast-off member of the Village People, hooking up with a Hot Chick!







Sunday, May 15, 2011

GOOD LOOKING OUT, DYLAN!

Dylan and Kalau
(Photo courtesy of Erin and Pua)


Dad!  Mom!  HELP ME!

Kalau escaped from Mom's tummy!

Saturday, May 14, 2011

LESS IS MORE

Tucker the Cat
(Hawaiian Odysseus photo)



What?

Oh, you want me to move?

Tucker the Cat
(Hawaiian Odysseus photo)



Alright...

How's that?

Monday, May 9, 2011

ONE OF NIKE'S FAVORITE CUSTOMERS

Millipede Doing Intervals
(Photo courtesy of Ryan)


Man alive!  That 26.2 meter marathon is a GRIND!

I was doing stellar time until I hit a wall at the 20-meter mark.  

It was all I could do to tell my legs (and legs and legs and legs and legs and legs...ah, you get my drift!) to keep going.

On sheer will power alone, I finished.

14 hours, 23 minutes, 38 seconds.  

Not anywhere near elite performance, but a personal best nonetheless.

And I finished.  That's what truly counts!  I FINISHED!

Up next:  The Hawaiian Multi-Pede Triathlon!

I'm fine-tuning my training...a second interval session each week at Kapaa High School; running in sand at Kealia Beach; hill training up on the Sleeping Giant; and LSD (long, slow distance) running on Sundays around Lihue Airport.

Just wait and see!  

The Kenyan centipedes CAN EAT MY DUST!



Sunday, May 8, 2011

HEY, FELLAHS! WHAT'S ALL THE FUSS ABOUT?

Divers' Booty
(Photo courtesy of Silas K. Aqui)


What?  You haven't heard?  There's a new bathhouse in town.  And it's free!

No way!  What's the name of it?

Braddah Charlie's Portable Fish Cleaning Sink!

No wonder the fish are lined up for coral blocks around!  Hoo boy!  Hot sauna and massage, here I come!

Uncle Charlie's Portable Fish Cleaning Sink
(Photo courtesy of Silas K. Aqui)

Check out where the fish are hanging out:

Friday, May 6, 2011

DANCING TO THE BEAT OF A DISTANT PAHU DRUM

Dylan and His Aloha Shirt
May Day Program, 2011
(Photo courtesy of Uncle Charlie)


Aloha, everybody!
  
I don't know about you,
but whenever I put on my Aloha shirt...

I feel like doing a HULA KAHIKO!*

Dylan in Hula Kahiko Mode
(Photo courtesy of Uncle Charlie)



*Hawaiian dance in the ancient style; made especially popular by contemporary male hula performers. 

INSEPARABLE

Kalaunuiohua with His Bag of Poi
(Photo courtesy of Erin and Pua)


TIGHT AND THICK LIKE SUPERGLUE--

A KANAKA AND HIS BAG OF POI!


Monday, May 2, 2011

WHEW! I'M EXHAUSTED!

Squirrel--Taking Five
(Photo courtesy of Ryan)



It's hard work

stashing MY NUTS!


                                          

OSAMA BIN LADEN UPDATE

MUPS (Manta Underwater Postal Service) Courier
(Photo courtesy of Ryan)


Manny here...Manny of Manta Underwater Postal Service!  

Just cruising by to give you an abbreviated update.

OBAMA - 1

OSAMA - 0